6: Becoming An Effective Leader

I know what leadership looks like. Adults took my lead as soon as I was born. We rely on the leadership of caretakers for years after birth, unlike animals born with behaviour programmed in their DNA. We also learn from observation and the great teachers, Pain and Pleasure. Once mature, we have the opportunity to challenge what we’ve learned.

Three months ago I applied for a promotion and was unsuccessful. I received feedback on my interview including my main opportunity for growth… I have been challenged to develop my business leadership. The leadership I’ve observed in others, the books I’ve read, the quotes I know haven’t made me an effective leader. I still become overwhelmed, passive and frustrated like, a lot.

As I grew up, I learned to use my passivity to avoid conflicts and enjoy the security of my social bonds. To develop business leadership, that tendency needs to be challenged. When a challenging decision requires that I be assertive and directive, I often feel cortisol warning me that I’m about to threaten my social ‘safety’. No amount of quotes or leadership books negate this feeling if you have learned as I have.  We cannot get under or over this feeling, we are going to make our way through it. Meanwhile, let’s develop our manager mind.

This episode shares the few ways I am moving towards effective leadership. I welcome you outside your comfort zone, into the world of leadership. Thank you Pain for guiding us so carefully, and thank you Pleasure, for our desire to lead with integrity, grace and effectiveness.

Nadine Thomas

Retail Demi-God